Finally, I could take no more.

“YOU GOTTA STOP TALKING ABOUT GILLIGAN’S ISLAND!” I blurted.

Their confused, blank stares were evidence that they had never witnessed such an urgent need for concentration before.

So, after several minutes of akward silence I exclaimed “and don’t think of drumming up a conversation about The Ropers either.”

That shut ‘em up.

the design would fill the frosted plexiglass that the touchscreen monitor is mounted into in my home jukebox, as you can see in these photos: (no the walls are not pink, they are orange. the flash makes them look all pinkish)

so… which one would you pick?
(click any of them to see a big close-up version)

design #5 just added by request, so if you want to cast another vote, just clear your cookies and you should be able to vote again

so an intro exists… a good sign that the show will be aired.

To give credit where credit is due, that intro was made by Craig Stouffer (a.k.a. Mr. BANDITO) from lostproject.net .
He has done some amazing work and I’m sure you’d recognize some of it if you watch his showreel 2007

please excuse us while we do a bit of design overhauling after a site upgrade.

But, you say “chadd, i’ve never played craps! i don’t want to look like a complete tool and get yelled at by the dealers and shunned by the rest of the people at the table and have my girlfriend leave me and my dog get run over by a train and my house burn down and my momma not get paroled!”

Fear not!

First of all, you are not living the perfect country & western song (see minute 3:05).

Second, I’m going to give you the basics of how to play casino craps right here, in 20 easy to follow steps.

1. Walk up to the table and find an empty spot.
2. Set your drink on the bottom drink rail. All casino craps tables, and most home tables should have them. you never set your drink on the top chip rail. that’s for chips. pretty simple, the names give the purpose of the rails away.
3. Look for the big “puck” on the table. it looks like this:
4. if the puck is white and says “on”, just wait. if it is black and says “off”, put your money down on the table. never hand your money to the dealer, they can’t take it from your hand. just put it on the table, in the marked up part, and they will cash it into chips for you.
5. take your chips and put them in the top chip rail. not to be confused with the lower drink rail, see step 2.
6. put down your bet in front of you, on the pass line area.
7. if it is your turn to roll the dice, they will give you a bunch of them to choose from (probably 5 or so). pick two. they’ll take the rest back and then when you are ready, toss them down to the other end of the table.
8. some points about handling and throwing the dice:
   • never bring the dice back over the railing, you’ll get yelled at by the dealers
   • always use only one hand to hold the dice
   • blowing on dice is fine, having your hottie girlfriend blow on them is even better
   • always make sure you hit the wall of the table opposite you. you don’t want to look like a wimp or something
   • keep the dice on the table. don’t whip them off into the stratosphere, you’ll look like a dork.
   • don’t roll them into a bunch of piles of chips that are on the table
   • don’t throw them so hard they bounce from the back wall to the the front and back again.
   • optimum throw: lob them about chin high so they land just short of the back wall and then bounce against the back wall and come back at you a couple bounces and stop.
   • show some control with your dice throw, you’ll impress your hottie girlfriend
9. ok, you threw the dice like a pro, and in the process you didn’t spill a drop of the martini that you are holding in your other hand. very smooth.
10. if you rolled a 2, 3, or a 12, you lose your ‘pass line’ bet, and the whole thing starts over, but you don’t have to pass the dice, you get to roll again
11. if you rolled a 7 or 11, you automatically win your ‘pass line’ bet and the dealer will put your winnings down by your original bet, then you can scoop up your winnings, and you’ll get to put another bet on the pass line and roll again
12. if you roll anything else, 4, 5, 6, 8, 9, or 10, then that becomes the “point” and the dealer will take the puck and move it to that number and flip it so the puck is white and says “on” to mark what the point is.
13. now’s when you can play your ‘odds’ bet. this is an extra bet that you put behind your original pass bet. this is the best bet in the casino since it is paid off at the actual odds of rolling the number, with no casino cut.
14. how much can you bet on your odds bet? it is posted on a little sign on the wall of the inside of the table next to the minimum bet amount, and usually says 4x or 5x or 10x or something. that means you can bet that much times your original pass line bet. so if you bet $5 on the pass line and it says ‘5x odds’, then you can bet $25 on your odds bet. i’m not going to get into all the odds of what point pays what payout, just know that this is the best bet in the casino, and you want to bet as much on your odds bet as your bankroll can afford or you are allowed at this table.
15. now, let’s recap where we are: you have a bet on the pass line, an odds bet backing it up, a martini in one hand, and a girl on your side, and you just rolled a ‘point number’.
16. now you roll again. it boils down to this: if you hit your ‘point number’ before you hit a 7, you win your pass line bet and the odds bet behind it. if you hit a 7 first, you lose both your bets. no other numbers matter, if you roll anything but your point number or a 7, you just keep getting the dice back and you continue to roll.
17. if you hit the point number, everyone will cheer, you’ll stand back, finish your martini and flag down the cocktail waitress while the dealer pays you out by stacking chips next to your bets.
18. scoop up your bets and order your next martini (remember to tip).
19. no matter if you hit your point or not, the dealers will then flip the puck back to the black off position and move it to the side. then, if you hit your point, you’ll get to keep the dice, otherwise, the dealers will pass them to the next guy.
20. start over at step 6.

Yes, there’s a ton of other bets that you can make at a craps table, and you’ll see people throwing money all over the place. But this is the basics, and will get you into the fun. If you can follow those steps, you will look like you know what you are doing, and you will be playing the highest player advantage strategy.

Have fun and see you at the tables!